


Flies Are Attracted To Shit (BeelzebubxGabriel)

by SinScrivener



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-03
Updated: 2020-01-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:53:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22101370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SinScrivener/pseuds/SinScrivener
Relationships: Beelzebub & Gabriel (Good Omens), Beelzebub/Gabriel (Good Omens)
Kudos: 12





	Flies Are Attracted To Shit (BeelzebubxGabriel)

The buzzing of a fly was all anyone in the room heard as papers were being read and signed and filed.

The Archangel Gabriel seemed to not mind it, his face lost into the words he needed to read, the report about something going on on Earth.

Ahead of him at the same table, Lord Beelzebub sat with the same concentration upon their face, going over new guidelines for Demons to send the damned down in a kind of order, Bribes, Sex, ect. It was nice to know what damned you were dealing with.

Out of nowhere, the silence was broken by someone zipping upon a hoverboard and screaming, "GABRIEL IS SHIT!!!"

The two powers of Heaven and Hell stopped fast and looked up at one another then back towards where the voice had zipped from and watched now two new bodies tugging along upon the board, sliding along on their bellies after him as they held onto the machine he rode, his voice calling as he zipped past again the opposite way, "KNOW HOW I KNOW?"

"Crowley, right?" Gabriel asked as the clump of bodies zipped out. Beelzebub opened their mouth to tell him he was correct when Crowley came back now with two more bodies attached to him and his board as he zipped past screaming, "CAUSE FLIES ARE ATTRACTED TO SHIIIIT!!!"

The bodies, slowing down the hoverboard happened to be, Hastur and Ligur tugging the machine along their bellies, Dagon holding him along the waist and, screeching at him in demonic tongues, lastly, Aziraphale held tightly to Crowley's head as his partner slower now, zipped back out of the room the two powers sat inside once in silence.

"May I?" Gabriel asked and Beelzebud smirked before snapping their fingers and heard the machine Crowley was zipping on die with a pop.

Out ran Hastur, Ligur, and Dagon, the sound of flies buzzing from the other room told Gabriel how the machine was killed and chuckled as next, bridal style, Crowley pranced back through the room the two had been working in together.

"Know what ELSE flies are attracted to, Crowley?" Beelzebud asked softly, bending some, icy blue eyes bright, "Dead things!"

"But...zeeer… Is it, Zir…" Aziraphale spoke softly, Beelzebud blinking, smile never faulting from their lips. "Crowley… Isn't technically de..ead.. Demons aren't reanimated corpses… Your.. Lordship!"

The sound of cracking knuckles spoke volumes behind Beelzebubs words as Gabriel stood behind them, grinning darkly, "Oooh I didn't say he was dead juuust yet, soft Angel~"

To Aziraphale's credit he TRIED to carry Crowley off quickly, not used to another's weight, he balanced wrong and yelped as Holy Lightning flashed above his head, Crowley screeching and now tangled together, the two ran out as best they could, flies and lightning following the two off.

Once the commotion died downstairs, Beelzebud looked to Gabriel and smirked, eyebrows cocked, "Wish to watch me soil my God given vassal, you Holy Piece of Shit?"

Gabriel snorted and wrapped an arm around their shoulder replying with, "I'd be delighted, My Gross Maggot Prince~"


End file.
